Promises are often made in moments of vulnerability. They serve as coping mechanisms, crafted by our ordinary minds when we are overwhelmed by emotional turmoil. In our need to belong, to offer assurance, or to appease others, we make promises without fully understanding the consequences. These vows, born in the heat of emotional distress, are not necessarily made with the belief that we can fulfil them, but rather because we see no other way to handle the intense reality before us.
Impermanence teaches us that vows are often doomed to fail—not because we can’t keep them, but because time eventually runs out. Yet, time itself is a construct of our imagination. Continuity suggests that time extends into another lifetime, and thus, so do our promises. These vows become etched into our emotions, unwittingly carried from one life to the next.
It is misguided to believe that a promise can resolve any problem; instead, it becomes a burden for both the promisor and the promisee. Regardless of the outcome, a promise is essentially a transaction and such relationships often fail to withstand the test of time. Even worse, unresolved relationships from past lives can resurface in the present, perpetuating a cycle dictated by the principles of Karma.
We should not rely on promises to comfort ourselves or others, even when trying to instil hope, as there is no guarantee that a promise will be enough. Instead, we should rely on our discernment to do what is morally right and necessary before we reach a point where a promise is made. In short, if we choose and plan our lives wisely, we should never have to make promises. Once we master this in our current life, we will likely never need to rely on promises in future lives. Habits shape who we are, in this life and the next.
A promise is eternal—so think carefully before making one. You may unknowingly create Karmic obligations in your future lives.